I hate this blog

Because I end up laughing at myself, it’s embarrassing.

And then, I do it again, I write something and click publish… I hate it!

Here is what I just finished writing, it’s ridiculous, I’m going to laugh at myself as it gets edited, proofread, chopped… published

Please do not read:

Spending nineteen thousand hours in the same buildings, with the same people, with an ever evolving set of standards, rules, GMO’s served.

Bathrooms, Food, Water by special permission only.

Who asks to urinate? That’s embarrassing.

Who asks for a drink? That’s silly.

Who asks for food and is told to wait? Beggars, not my children.

But, they need to learn to comply don’t they?

Respect and compliance are not the same thing.

What can 19,000 hours of socializing do for you?

Ever hear of quiet time? Time outs? Suspension? Detention? Expulsion? It sounds like war…. doesn’t it.. here, try reading those words again while thinking about a warm fuzzy war story in the news: time out, suspension, detention, expulsion… that’s war terminology. No it’s not 🙂 Yes it is…

Did you know that not so long ago children were treated as if in boot camp, marched in and out of class, even dismissed in a military fashion? 

For what reason would children need to march like soldiers? 

Better yet, how about filling out forms for a good amount of that 19,000 hours?

Forms are good!!! Especially if you’ll need to apply for any government loans/give backs/jobs/enlistment/contracts…… after you meet the taxman kid.

One more time please: Forms are good!!!!

Even better, lock the place down and make kids ask for a toilet break, water, food, to leave the campus, to leave their chair.

If anyone farts, call the police and have them arrested, even the youngest of them, even down to the age of 5 years old.

If they can’t sit in the chair… take them to the doctor for some Ritalin.

If Ritalin doesn’t work… there is stronger stuff… take ’em back to the doctor.

Luckily, the government has a way for every kid to do this, even teenagers, all the way up to eighteen or nineteen years of age.

Do it for the children!

If you are one of the lucky kids and are happy with the success of those 19,000 hours, please like this post.

Highly Appreciated: Rude comments, war stories and controversy.

My favorite part is about farting, but the reality is, this actually happened in a school.

I hate my blog.

Now, I’m going to laugh at my self and hope nobody ever reads this.

Sometimes, Quitting is Impossible…

without taking a public ride of shame.

 

The best part about arriving at the top of a mountain and sliding off a ski lift is seeing all the Texans wearing Wranglers and Dallas Cowboy’s jackets.

We all know who you are and love the style. It’s a good thing you brought two pairs of wranglers because it’s cold. At fourteen, I was convinced to try snowboarding, my head, buttocks and wrists hurt after a day of that. A few years passed before snowboarding became my new mountain to conquer. Skiing is something that seems born in to me. Before conquering snowboarding, my spine conquered some of the finer points of bouncing down a mountain full of rocks, bumps and trees. I still do it, but a little less aggressively these days. Finding that the body responds better when less jostled is a hard learned and often too late discovered truth. Some people can’t help but do a million flips until they are 75 years old, I applaud their abilities and hope for the same.

My daughter began snowboarding on her birthday if I remember accurately. Nobody sticks around to argue facts here, it’s a peaceful place and we always work together to find solutions.

She had a couple of lessons. By the third day, she was on the intermediate slopes in beautiful powder as deep as her chest. We ate up all of the powder days that year, got snowed in a few times and did it the next day. The powder pass was on sale and kids passes were free for her age. We ate, we laughed, she cried, at times I wanted to cry, I encouraged her, we made it down each time. It was frustrating, fun. The best thing about being stuck twelve thousand feet on a mountain in a steep field of fresh snow is knowing there exists one way down, by sliding frantically past trees, bumps, rocks, ledges into pillows of neck deep powder consuming a tiny purple dragon into the snorkel zone. It’s really frustrating to learn anything new at all, but the point is to learn.

Tears in her eyes and screaming at me about how hard it is, cold, she now drags me down the advanced stuff, no bowls, glades or chutes yet, but I see it coming.

It seems as hard as things are to learn in life, they require more maintenance down the road. It is wonderful to see children explore. I tried to follow Lily around the playground when she was less than two years old. My head got bumped a couple times, playgrounds are not for helicopters, parents or people over four-foot-something. As a loving parent, none would ever let their kid get hurt, on purpose. Every child burns their hand, gets a scrape, broken bone, some are more cautious than others. I realized early on how important failure is to the learning process. If a parent is an instant safety net, helicopter, dispenser of answers, and swooping up baby from each little incident, how may children learn to learn? It’s hard, it takes a lot of deep breathing to watch a kid fall down and not have a huge reaction. Trying to wait for their response is a lot less scary, sometimes kids don’t even need comfort, they can handle it without a drama.

Being the dad of a princess is challenging. She has an inventive mind, always wantint to create, build, explore, investigate, mix, discover, collect, gather, spend, earn, learn, jump, run. I have no skills with hair styles, understand little to nothing about painting nails, French braiding, but can teach about music, English, Spanish mathematics, science, language and learn about anything.

I like to make fun of societal norms, identify common beliefs and make a joke things that seem common, but not natural. 

For good measure and in the spirit of what I do best, please look at this funny yet tragic picture. This guy is probably not a Texan, but I’m pretending he is, because who doesn’t love to make fun of the biggest state?  (Excluding Alaska). If ever I go to Kentucky, watch out. 

 

Now, the Purple Dragon has learned to snowboard, she’s pressuring life to get on a pair of ski’s… If we don’t do it this year, we will be one year older when we finally get around to it.